One of my usual blog stops Lifehacker has a post on research that indicates that positive self talk can actually lead to lower self esteem, which, if confirmed, threatens the vast majority of the self-help publishing industry.
The mention points to this piece at Time, which says: “A study (The Link requires a special log in to read, a practice this blog takes an editorial stance against.) just published in the journal Psychological Science says trying to get people to think more positively can actually have the opposite effect: it can simply highlight how unhappy they are.”
In reference to this, anyone with a 1990s memory or popular American TV will have to recall one of Al Franken’s better characters from Saturday Night Live, Stuart Smalley, the self-affirmation obsessed 12-stepper who invariably ended up hating himself at some point in each skit.
The study, Positive Self-Statements: Power for Some, Peril for Others has gone on to be widely reported.
“The researchers asked participants with low self-esteem and high self-esteem to repeat the self-help book phrase “I am a lovable person.” The psychologists then measured the participants’ moods and their momentary feelings about themselves. As it turned out, the individuals with low self-esteem felt worse after repeating the positive self-statement compared to another low self-esteem group who did not repeat the self-statement. The individuals with high self-esteem felt better after repeating the positive self-statement–but only slightly.
In a follow-up study, the psychologists allowed the participants to list negative self-thoughts along with positive self-thoughts. They found that, paradoxically, low self-esteem participants’ moods fared better when they were allowed to have negative thoughts than when they were asked to focus exclusively on affirmative thoughts.”
“Positive self-statements are widely believed to boost mood and self-esteem, yet their effectiveness has not been demonstrated,” the abstract reads. ” Repeating positive self-statements may benefit certain people, but backfire for the very people who ‘need’ them the most.”
This isn’t really shocking news to me, but an important study none the less as there are entire sections devoted to this at bookshops in nearly every part of the world. Personally, I couldn’t imagine a more depressing way to start the day than to stare at a mirror chanting “I am lovable.” What better reminder of being alone than to conduct such an embarrassing ritual that you’d never do in the presence of anyone (and wouldn’t really need to if anyone was actually there)?
But what’s been more interesting is something else this research indicated: Time reports “The paper provides support for newer forms of psychotherapy that urge people to accept their negative thoughts and feelings rather than try to reject and fight them.”
That’s quite a worldview change for a number of people, though. The main obstacle to this being that we generally make the equation of negative = bad. Negative thoughts are to be avoided, positive thoughts are to be encouraged. Obviously dwelling too much on the negative can be an unhealthy pastime, but couldn’t the same be said over developing a pattern of suppressing it and focusing solely on thoughts that make us happy? All these make-me-a-star TV shows are full of people who have convinced themselves through constant positive thinking that they can be pop idols, the bulk of which end up in ego-crushing moments in which their off-key warbling achieves no more than a few cheap laughs at their expense.
Before Al Franken was a politician in one of the most hotly contested elections in the U.S., he was funny.
I’m sort of reminded of the Fight Club line, “We were raised on television to believe that we’d all be millionaires, movie gods, rock stars, but we won’t. And we’re starting to figure that out.” Both the film and the book are peppered with a litany of anti-affirmations that are likely as or more liberating than their opposites: “You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else.”
Unfortunately, as the Time article points out, this line of thinking is far from the therapeutic orthodoxy, which remains steeped in “cognitive restructuring.” The problem here is that people are checking themselves in to be fixed, and our short-attention-span culture wants mantras that work as quick as an aspirin. We see self-defeating attitudes as thoughts we see as negative (“I’m not good at this” or “I’m not lovable”) while we see into constructive habits as focusing on the positive thought (“I am good at this” or “I am lovable”). This seems to me that it could be an example where therapy could borrow from science, in which the person is asked to identify proof of being lovable, while remembering, that it’s okay that you’re not really that cute and cuddly to everyone. Or, “you can relax, it’s not all about you.”
Wood, J., Elaine Perunovic, W., & Lee, J. (2009). Positive Self-Statements: Power for Some, Peril for Others Psychological Science, 20 (7), 860-866 DOI: 10.1111/j.1467-9280.2009.02370.x
July 13th, 2009 at 11:42 am
Albert Ellis would tell us that the problem lies in the self-rating of talk like “I am lovable.”
July 13th, 2009 at 2:51 pm
True. He sort of goes after basing it on the opinion of others. I haven’t really read any of him, but a perusal of his self-acceptance stuff seems like a different route to the same place.
July 13th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
This has always been put subtly as ‘Its the reaction’ not the action which matters.
July 18th, 2009 at 2:58 am
I think the criticism of affirmations is misplaced. The criticism is really of certain types of affirmations and certain tendencies in their use.
While those are important to recognize, I hope that not too many people paint the entire concept of positive self-talk with the “it can backfire” brush.
July 18th, 2009 at 9:59 am
I think this is a good point. The Time post I think looks at this some. A follow-up would have to look at different types of statements as well as methodologies. I think there’s something inherently lonely about the statement used in this study, or the use of mirrors and such things. It all seems a bit drastic. Would be interested in seeing it compared to methods of self-approval based on tangible qualities a person actually has.
August 1st, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Great post , naturally misery is the human condition … although affirmations can be very helpful as a self awareness /self management tool the key to there successful use is self discipline (14-30 days ) and choosing an affirmation that doesn’t have a reference point in a negative emotional anchor. the trick is to concentrate on that in which you wish to experience.
September 7th, 2009 at 4:56 pm
The truth is that the particular affirmation, the way it is phrased, the tonality used when it is said are all things that I never hear these studies take into consideration.
If you want a very powerful affirmation do this. Pick someone the “patient” finds to be a 100% authority. This is often a parent, even if the person is an adult. Have the authority record the affirmations “[patient name], you are SO lovable.” “[patient name], I like you.” Make certain that person who is reading and recording the affirmation is doing so with a genuine tonality that reflects certainty and sincerity.
This recorded affirmation is RIDICULOUSLY powerful.
That’s why the “high self-esteem” people felt better. They were more inclined to use tonalities that actually made them feel better, because they felt better already. Simple.
October 3rd, 2009 at 3:17 am
[...] self-train. One method is a slight difference on a topic I’ve posted on here before, that of positive self-talk. In the manner of “positive self-statements,” I’m still not a fan. It’s an [...]
January 1st, 2010 at 8:54 am
omg THANK you. I’ve found that everything in “self-help” literature to only make me feel more miserable, even when they purport it to do the opposite. Thanks for showing that I’m not th only one!! That crap is bogus!
January 1st, 2010 at 8:57 am
Oh, and Al Franken is still funny! The recent clips of him in the Senate are priceless.
January 23rd, 2010 at 8:25 pm
My personal experience contradicts this… (yeah, yeah, anecdote != data, I know) You have to be very careful with positive affirmations, though. Like other commenters have pointed out already, you have to make the focus be what you desire, NOT what you desire to escape… for example, “I am not fat” is a terrible affirmation and will just make the speaker focus on being fat. A better alternative would be “I’m slender, healthy, and beautiful.” If it happens that this is obviously, blatantly false and that upsets you, you could change it slightly: “I LOVE being slender, healthy, and beautiful”. The focus is on the positive, and the statement is technically true..
Big fan of Al Franken here
January 24th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
Hey, whatever works. Anecdotal information isn’t useless, just not a basis on it’s own, but we all learn from our own experiences. Statistics provide an average, but that isn’t going to fit everyone’s unique situation. I would like to see some more variations in the types of self affirmations studied.
Personally, I believe that most productive people who have high degrees of a sense of self worth and accomplishments do actually make affirmations to themselves habitually, but this doesn’t happen in an orchestrated method, but it more of an organic process. What if instead of being verbs, people tried active verbs. per your example, a person may love being slender or healthy, but that doesn’t necessarily make them slender or healthy. Affirmations should built on action that leads to some sort of satisfaction. Instead of looking in a mirror and saying it, think it when you wake up, while having breakfast and doing your normal routine. Instead of thinking something along the lines of “I am slender (or whatever)” think “I’m going to” use the stairs or eat something that is good for me or something like that.
Affirmatation-building goals that lead to steps toward a desired development. Another thing this does is remove the “self” from the thought. Take yourself out of the center for a little bit and put something else there. Studies in happiness of both people who do religious activities and of those who engage in community and social activism (I’m in the middle of a post on this) show that when people are engaged in thinking of doing positive things that take the self out of the center, and especially when it’s built on a structure of tangible activity, they have much higher senses of self worth and self respect. I think that this could possibly be repeated even in self image issues. Instead of looking at yourself standing there and saying it, use that great gift we have: imagination, and picture yourself doing and behaving in the way you think lives up to that image and keep it realistic enough that you might actually do what you picture during the day. The thing about low self esteem is that it has knock-on negative results.
A person with low body image or esteem issues may drink too much or smoke or do participate other destructive habit. These become habit. An overweight person who is fixated on this may decide what’s the use? and add to the problem by over indulging on unhealthy food options. Tie it to action: I’m going to … today because I’m worth ….. Make it manageable and realistic so there’s a higher potential for a sense of accomplishment to build upon, but put the emphasis on the activity and not the self, because the value adjustment is then on a vastly different scale.
Anyway, them’s my two bits on that.
April 23rd, 2010 at 3:08 pm
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May 23rd, 2010 at 8:15 pm
Well, i don’t general respond to comments by email, but if you see this, please note that you’re free to use any and as much of the content you find here under the terms my creative commons use license, which basically means you only need to give attribution and not use it for commercial purposes. Cheers.